tell me this is temporary. that one day i will wake up to a bowl of fresh strawberries & earth will be a head of hair. i look out the portal to see the darkness as thick as grease. stars speaking their old languages. i used to want the distance to dance like veils. used to hold a telephone to every door. this is the nest of the oldest hermit. a woman with five-thousand years of loneliness. no pictures on the walls just rings of salt in every room. a cottage the size of a thumb. i think maybe i could purchase her life. lead my own wandering into hers. what do i have to do to get my permanent vanishing? i’m putting on my suite to walk in search of a dandelion for conversation. on the moon sentences are written by distance. could we orbit today then? step forward through dust. animal shadow. songs of dead species. all the while, you sit on earth & maybe drink water or watch television or close your eyes for a second too long. promise me i can have a beautiful life. give me the oldest ocean dried for lack of fingers. a flock of strings plucked to make an orchestra. i have one more day here before i have to become a girl again. all the clocks say different years. i take a bath in sunlight. feel the cottage exhale. go out one last time to stare at my own foot prints leading away into the galaxy’s purple-black. help, i don’t want to go back to my stained-glass life.
-- Robin Gow is a trans poet and young adult author from rural Pennsylvania. They are the author of Our Lady of Perpetual Degeneracy (Tolsun Books 2020) and the chapbook Honeysuckle (Finishing Line Press 2019). Their first young adult novel, A Million Quiet Revolutions is forthcoming in March 2022 with FSG Books for Young Readers.